BE QUIET!!!!

Okay, it has been a long time since I've posted here....whoa! So much has happened....

I still wressle w/ back issues. The pain is more manageable as is the anxiety.... w/ the help of pharmacology..... I couldn't do it alone..... Took me a long time to admit that.

Started physical therapy..... we are only working on stretching and breathing... I hold my breath. Not a good thing to do when you are trying to live.

Went to Arizona for a week at the end of August.... Creative Escape conference. Very nice, swanky resort....scrapbookers delight for a week.... too hot though.

Mark is in New MExico..... hunting. He, alone w/ a guide...... eek... first phone message last night after a week gone.... missing him dearly.

Ev is 19 months and a DOLL! More fun and loveable every day.

-kicks this ole place to see if it has a heartbeat- life with an injury....

im depressed....... it's very sad..... i probably could use some help.....

im still in love, happy as a clam about my Ev.... have hope..... faith and dreams

but pain is an ugly bitch of a friend...... its old and never ending it seems....

whoa is me And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky its 4 09 and i've been up since 2 ish..... Pain is an ugly friend. It scares me, irritates me and makes me so anxious that I can barely stand being idle. Sleep is no longer much of an option.... and it's hard to take care of a 17 month old w/ no sleep or .... mashed out on oxycodone......

I hurt my back 3 weeks ago tomorrow and each day it gets worse, not better.... that can't be good. Went to the Dr on Monday.... had EKG, xrays, blood work.... and have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow..... if I can lay flat or still for that matter.....

Im scared of finding out what it is, I am scared of not finding out what it is.....

im just scared

to everyone =)

All activities on the SD front have been cancelled due to the fact that my back hurts so bad that I never sleep at night. I am awake all night long and each night im pretty certain im dying =)

Other than that.... the family will just hang out together today, play it by ear and see how the day unfolds.

BUbba is outside, he is selling his 1947 Chevy Thriftmaster .... well he sold it on eBay.... the guy is here picking it up....via Utah...he is from COLorado. He paid in cash. He put 5000 down the day he won the auction and brought 9000 in 100 dollar bills. Odd. Oddy odd. If he didn't look like OPie I would be worried. Actually I mentioned to BUbba that I was worried he'd come back later tonight and whack us. Like the craigslist hubbub. I don't want to be any eBay hubbub.

With all that cashola sitting there... I am dreaming of new dining room furniture. Ohhhhhheyeahhhhhhh.



3 years ago today.... BUbb and I got married! Feels like yesterday... and yet, so much has happened between then and now. Feels weird that I haven't even known him for 5 years....

Here we are.... happy, healthy, a beautiful baby... focused... and living life every day.... It's fabulous!

Sometimes it is good to throw caution to the wind, take a chance, find goodness and run with it. Goodness doesn't only just happen, it is made... cultured. We have a sweet recipe for goodness....

=) here's to many more

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